By: Dr. Phyllis G. Bivins-Hudson
July has a way of arriving loud. The sun is high, the air is thick, and the heat seems to settle itself into everything—our homes, our cars, our skin, and sometimes even our patience.
It is the month when people often talk about cookouts, fireworks, vacations, beaches, and family trips. And while all of those things have their place, July can also offer something deeper if we are willing to slow down long enough to notice it.
This July feels different for me. I am still carrying the joy, gratitude, and fullness of my Finding December book release party. What a beautiful celebration it was.
To see family, friends, readers, supporters, and loved ones gathered in one space to honor not just a book, but a journey, was more than I could have imagined.
Finding December was born from reflection, healing, memory, and truth.
To witness people embrace that story with such warmth reminded me that when we tell the truth about our lives, we often give others permission to reflect on their own.
The book release party was not just an event. It was a moment of completion, connection, and confirmation. It confirmed that stories matter.
It confirmed that healing has an audience. It confirmed that December, for me, was never just a month. It was a place of arrival.
And now, as July unfolds in all of its heat and heaviness, I find myself thinking about the space between celebration and stillness.
Sometimes after a major moment in our lives, we do not immediately know what to do with the quiet that follows.
We spend so much time preparing, planning, producing, presenting, and pushing forward that when the applause softens and the room empties, we are left with ourselves.
That is not always a bad thing. In fact, it can be sacred. July invites us to pause—not because life has stopped, but because our bodies, minds, and spirits may need a different rhythm.
That is why I am using this season to step back, breathe, and reset.
My Thursday Sidebar is officially on hiatus until Thursday, September 3, 2026. I am so grateful for everyone who has joined me, listened, commented, reflected, and shared space with me each week.
When Thursday Sidebar returns in September, I invite you to join me for a new season of honest conversation, reflection, storytelling, and truth-telling.
We will continue exploring the places where life, identity, womanhood, education, resilience, survival, healing, and becoming intersect.
But for now, July is asking us to do something a little different.
Not simply to endure the heat, but to create meaning inside of it. So, instead of only asking, “Where are we going this summer?” maybe we can ask:
1.What needs cooling off in my life? 2. What needs my attention now that the noise has quieted?
3. What small joy can I give myself without waiting for a special occasion?
4. What part of me is still becoming?
In the spirit of doing July differently, here are a few simple activities that may help you move through the sweltering heat with intention, creativity, and care:
1. Create a “cool corner” in your home with a favorite chair, a cold drink, a book, a candle, soft music, or a journal. Let It become your personal retreat.
2. Write a letter to the version of yourself who survived something difficult and did not give up.
3. Revisit an old photograph and write down the memory behind it. sometimes pictures hold stories we have not fully told.
4. Host a small “story night” with family or friends where everyone shares one lesson life has taught them.
5. Choose one book, one podcast, or one meaningful conversation that feeds your spirit rather than drains your energy.
6. Make a “July joy list” of small things you can do without spending much money—iced tea on the porch, a walk after sunset, a phone call with someone who makes you laugh, or a quiet hour with no demands.
7. Create your own “I found my December when…” reflection and think about a moment when you finally felt grounded, felt like you were enough, or felt at peace.
July does not have to be ordinary. It does not have to be only about heat, holidays, or travel. It can be about recovery. It can be about reflection. It can be about celebrating what has already happened while making room for what is still on the way.
For me, this July is a bridge. Behind me is the beautiful success of the Finding December book release party. Around me is the warmth of gratitude.
Ahead of me is a new season of Thursday Sidebar beginning September 3, 2026. And somewhere in between, I am allowing myself to breathe.
As for August, I have a feeling it may bring a different kind of reflection—one that asks what we are preparing to carry into the next season, and what we finally have permission to leave behind.
Until then, stay cool, stay reflective, and stay open to the quiet lessons July may be trying to teach while you find your December and fly on your own wings.