By: O.L./Sway Buckley
Anytime I've felt myself losing my sense of well-being, it has been due to not venting my thoughts and emotions.
Not giving vent to matters of the heart is a serious issue.
Our relationships and businesses will only succeed if we use healthy coping methods.
These issues are a big deal to me if you've read my previous articles.
Brothers, listen to me; I've paid a cost for the years of not updating my wife when I feel some type of way. As men, we get used to suppressing thoughts and feelings.
We think our feelings don't affect us negatively, and we can change our minds, and that'll be the end of whatever is wrong.
Not true!
To be clear, I'm not suggesting that we give voice to the entirety of what's on our hearts impulsively; that would be unwise, as (Prov 29:11) says. A wise person always considers timing, words, and patience before venting.
I've recently learned two fundamental principles to remember when getting issues off your chest.
First, set up and delivery matter. Your spouse holds your words with greater weight simply because of who you are to them. Even if they act like they don't, they do.
Relationships determine value, and value determines impact. As husbands, our words should be measured and selective without omitting the essence of what we're trying to say.
Second, assume you need to be a clearer communicator. As a person who speaks for a living, I've been told that I have a decent command of the English language.
The truth is, I have much growing to do as a communicator.
Precise and appropriate communication resides in the room for improvement. Poor and impulsive communication may cause collateral damage we didn't intend.
This is the quickest way to tack on another twenty-four hours of exhausting back and forth.
Successful married entrepreneurs thrive on healthy, constructive communication. If you're anything like me, you didn't grow up learning to communicate wisely and measuredly.
It's also possible that you grew up thinking not saying anything works best. The problem with all that is that it doesn't promote trust.
Productive communication is essential to building a legacy together.
I'll unpack this further following Monday in part two.
If you're looking for insights on systems that help keep you two working powerfully in sync, get on the Q4 FinishStrong Waitlist.
Here's to living purposefully, powerfully, and profitably in sync,
O.L. & Sway
O.L. is a former banker turned real estate consultant and entrepreneur. Sway is a former CEO of a staffing firm she started on her dorm room floor to pay for college. Together, they co-own Marriedpreneur Life Consultancy, equipping faith-based married entrepreneur couples with high-level systems to scale (without strain). They're the creators of the Marriedpreneur Operating Systems and the co-hosts of The Marriedprenuer Life Podcast, which was praised as one of Wedding Wire's top relationship podcasts. Learn more at MarriedpreneurLife.com.